Hola! It’s true that Indian men haven’t the best reputation in the world for being sexy. Bad PR, ugly-as-hell politicians, weird gyrating Bollywood actors in shiny suits and more, haven’t helped the Indian male’s pick-up comfort quotient with a foreign visitor at all.
But yet, there are a few things going for us. India may not have elephants and snake charmers on the streets any more, but we do have that exotic wild card. We are the land of the Kama Sutra and tantrico sex. We are one of the most populated countries in the world. So we must be doing something right.
So I chatted with a few expat women who were quite okay with kissing and telling. And here’s what they had to say about the kinds of guys one would ‘take a chance on’ while holidaying in India.
1. The guy who reminds her of her hogar: If you were wondering what your three years in Australia or London doing an expensive degree could do for you, here’s what! Once the exoticism of India wears off and the noise, pollution, accents, the beggars and touts, get to her, she will be desperate to connect with someone who understands where she’s coming from. This is where you enter. You talk about breakfast at C arluccio’s, soy lattes at Starbucks, the subway system in New York…and next thing you know you’re both cruising down highway 69.
2. The guy that’s so wrong (but so right): You may not understand her Espanol, but you know body language! Who cares if you just smile and nod when she’s speaking. Her plunging escote is much deeper than any conversation you could ever have. She knows she’s possibly flirting with danger, but it adds to the excitement.
You’re nothing like the ones she had before. She probably wouldn’t do this in her hometown. Or talk to her amigos about it. But she’s not home. And she’s on a journey of discovery. She doesn’t want to come across as being shallow or racist. She believes she’s totally growing as an individual by exposing herself to new cultures. Si. Si. Si…Senor!!!
3. The hitch-hiker’s guide to the g-spot: You’re the local who speaks perfect English, and goes to the backpacker bars just to hook up with girls you know are in town for the short haul. You work for a reputed multinational (That apparently puts you way down in the creep-o-meter). You know the safest clubs in town, the best café for her espresso fix. A reputed money changer, a reputed taxi guy, and a shop that sells genuine pashminas – no bargaining required. What’s more, you know that it’s a one-night-stand and will never send her a Facebook friend request. And you’re not too bad looking either. Sexo then, in exchange for all that doesn’t seem that much of an ask.
4. The guy that comes recomendado: Being the go-to guy for any of your friend’s friends visiting the city is apparently the most popular way of getting laid. She gets to see the real side of the city, a personal guide, the inside track, free rides and possibly a free stay. It’s the best way to get a lay from a layover. If you’re good, you’ll get good word-of-mouth. This way, you can have your cake and eat her friends too.
5. The horny youngster who will sleep with just about anything: Sex with sunburnt, past their sell-by-date specimens from beyond the Caucasus may not be everybody’s idea of divertida, but we have seen several instances of horny young or not-so-young men hanging around for a freebie.
It’s terrible. But it’s a win-win.
(In arrangement with THE MAN)